Monday, February 26, 2007

Cannon Fodder

Any many who sticks by his woman after a "horrific cannon accident" is a man to be admired.

Posted by Unclejbird @ 6:42 PM :: (1) comments

Sunday, February 25, 2007

Oscar Thoughts......

Gwyneth Paltrow's dress and Gary Oldman's costume from Francis Ford Coppola's Dracula....separated at birth?

























Jennifer Hudson's dress and the flyin' monkeys' getup from The Wizard of Oz?















Posted by Unclejbird @ 9:32 PM :: (2) comments

Saturday, February 17, 2007

In Search Of....

In the words of the immortal 80's supergroup Survivor, "The search is over."

You have read in this space and other superior blogs about the flyers for parties, or "jump offs," we teachers at my high school are continually finding about our classrooms when students leave them behind along with the day's classwork. Mostly, you've read about the progenitor of these parties, our school's answer to P. Diddy, a chap named Omar. Perhaps you joined me in my admiration for Omar and his organizational skills and his disdain for drama and beefs of all kinds. Around the time Rodney King said, "Can't we all get along," I'm convinced Omar was born into this world and found his calling. Here is a true uniter in a sea of dividers.

So I was standing outside my door the other day with a couple students and I heard one say, "Hey, Omar," as a group of kids walked by on the other side of the hall. "Is that THE Omar," I asked, "from the party flyers?"

A pause. Both the students standing nearby looked at me. "You know about the parties?"

"Of course. I find them along with your soda cans and candy wrappers on the floor under your desks when you leave."

I looked quickly down the hall to size up this local legend. He's a smallish kid, looked like a junior or sophomore, wearing the typical student getup...black nylon bomber jacket, baggy jeans, white t-shirt. He spoke with a squeaky, dare I say effeminate, voice. In short, he looked like any other kid you see in the hall between classes.

My illusion was crushed. Megan and I have talked about this and we both had Omar pegged as a twentysomething kid who went to our school at some point, but just can't let go, devoting himself to throwing parties.

We couldn't have been more wrong. Turns out he's just a kid...albeit a kid with unlimited cell phone minutes. Also, I'm told there's always some sort of drama going on at the allegedly drama-free parties. Who's surprised about that at any gathering of high-schoolers.

Here's a summary for all you visual learners out there:

What was I expecting?

















What did I find?










Do you blame me?

Trying to live with the disappointment,

Your Humble Author

Posted by Unclejbird @ 7:34 PM :: (1) comments

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Carrying the Cross

"Fucking bloggers."
- The Correspondent


And yes, I'm quoting. It's been an interesting couple of weeks for everyone's favorite AP correspondent. First, she gets sent to William and Mary to report on the removal of a cross from the college's famed Wren Chapel. Then she has to go cover a debate featuring a noted conservative talking head. Then, to make matters worse, she gets called out by a fellow blogger.

Hint: You know you're in for a reaming when the author starts out thusly:

The story of the Wren Chapel cross finally made it to the wire services yesterday, and I was so glad to see it... until I saw that AP writer Sonja Barisic had searched high and low and somehow found a student who is not only an orthodox Jew, but an orthodox Jew from Israel, who was willing to be quoted as saying "that as an Orthodox Jew he was uncomfortable when he and other freshmen were taken to the chapel during orientation."
Say it with me now: OH, NO YOU DIDN'T!!!!

The Mayor asks: Can reporters have beefs (the same way rappers can)? And if so, will there be a banking (what we old-timers called a rumble)? And if so, will the reporter be called on to cover her own rumble?

Good question. But, it seems that in the end it was all worth it. Her second foray into podcasting. Eat it, Adam Curry.

Side note: the Wren story with her name on it turned up 67 times in Google News just now.

That's what we call "Gettin' it done."

Posted by Unclejbird @ 5:13 PM :: (1) comments

Sunday, February 04, 2007

Blue Monday

So tomorrow at my school there's a huge series of staff meetings, during which we are to meet with our respective, ulp, DATA teams. School administrators are coming around to visit our meetings to make sure we're not mixing cocktails and eating canapes when we should be finding new ways to capture our students' learning in numerical form.

But first, let's re-wind. Since the beginning of this year, all teachers at my school have gone from working from a curriculum and having quite a bit of latitude in how they teach what's on that document to collaborating with other teachers at our grade levels on the exact questions on a test in each unit. Then we were to have students fill out the same Scantron sheet for the purposes of scanning their tests into the computer, then crunching the numbers on which students did best, which questions they answered with the most success, etc.

Tomorrow, we're supposed to hammer out, in line with the curriculum, what we're doing EACH DAY and exactly how we're doing it. That's right....all teachers will be doing the same lessons on the same days in the same way. Oh, yeah.....this has to be done for all the teachers' preps through the END OF SCHOOL in June. That bubbling noise you hear is my boiling blood.

All this leads to a bad feeling I've been having ever since this mess started. I laugh when I say it (because I'd cry or tear my hair out if I didn't), but perhaps what we're going toward is growing teachers on a stalk, Matrix-style, so that we're all drones dispensing knowledge to our students. All we need is for them all to have outlets built into the backs of their heads, so we could just hook them up to a cable and do away with the whole classroom management issue.

I wonder if the "rapture," as the Mayor calls it, will be further hastened by this. Apparently, there are quite a few teachers already planning their departures next year. Will our fearless leaders be chastened by an exodus? Or will they see it as less resistance to their evil plan?

Maybe I'll just chill and take the blue pill...

Posted by Unclejbird @ 8:58 PM :: (1) comments

Thursday, February 01, 2007

Holy Crap....

Once in a while, one stumbles upon greatness. More on this later, but during my presentation today on Black History Month, I ran across the following musical offering: Nina Simone singing "Strange Fruit."

In a word, haunting.

Posted by Unclejbird @ 9:08 PM :: (0) comments